Disconnect!

Sunday, July 5, 2015

We’re off the grid!

In this wired and connected age, it’s as if we are off the planet entirely!

Here at the cottage there has never been a cellular signal, but at least we have a telephone line, and through that I have been able to “dial-up” to the Internet and check news, and weather, and send and receive email.

But “dial-up” is no longer a possibility.

You see, in early June, my faithful nine-year old computer died. I replaced it with a new one – well “new” to me: it’s a four-year old refurbished model sufficiently similar to the one that had expired that I didn’t need a lot of new software. But it is a seriously evolved machine, all the same.

And it doesn’t, cannot, won’t do “dial-up.” I have three different external 56K modems, but it can’t even recognize two of them, and the one it does “see” dials my Internet provider, then disconnects the minute a connection is made.

But wait! Heather’s computer is here, and it, like my recently-deceased one, is nine years old. Maybe I can use it to “dial up” for news and weather and checking webmail?

Sure enough, that computer successfully logged on to our Internet provider, but when I asked for the weather, it took fifteen minutes for local weather to load (and did so only imperfectly), and my webmail site proved completely impossible to load after a wait of more than 40 minutes.

Clearly, the Internet itself has evolved so radically that even the most normal websites are too complex for “dial-up” to handle. 1

So, in a very real sense, “dial-up” is no longer a possibility, and we are therefore “off the grid.” You can’t reach us by email, nor by cellular phone, nor by text message – only by telephone.

You are reading this because Heather and I went into town for church today. Lunch followed at a restaurant, with John and Karen Bradley, our friends, after which we adjourned to their home, where I can use their wi-fi to update my website, and alert my friends and relations about our being off the grid. Mostly of the grid, of course, because whenever we go into town there is free wi-fi at coffee shops.

Settling in at the Cottage

Other than having no access to the Internet, however, our arrival at the lake this year has gone really well. Of course I’m stiff and sore from lifting and carrying and hauling things up and down rocky footpaths, but electricity works, the phone works, the pump for our water system works, and although I had to row across the lake several times while the boat’s battery was being charged, the battery and electric motor are now in the boat and we can zip across the water without breaking sweat.

I even had a hot shower yesterday in our whacky outdoor shower!

So... all is well.

Watch this space for updates which I will upload (a) if something interesting happens – which is unlikely, but you never know; and (b) if (a) should occur, when I can get into town to upload the story!

Next: A Universe of Pain

FOOTNOTES:

1 Interestingly, when I was on “dial-up” with Heather’s computer, I clicked on my own website – the one that you are looking at right now – and it loaded instantly! My extremely simple website design is now, apparently, obsolete, given how other, more professional, sites have swollen to enormous complexity.
Click here to get back to the narrative.